Sunday, September 30, 2007

but I love her...

A few days ago I had one of those typical mom-daughter conversations. We fought, we talked, we cried some, we laughed and at I am not quite sure why but at one point I just told her, that I was not her enemy and that I do not wish to be attacked every time I tell her something or let her know that what she is doing right now is not ok. She gave me "the look" again and so I just left and went back to my room...
I sat there for a while and thought "But I just love her and want what's best for her! Why doesn't she trust me or take my word seriously?", when it occured to me that this may actually be how our heavenly father feels a lot of times. We talk about being his children and claim him to be a loving father, but do we live accordingly? Do we listen to his words, may it be from the scriptures or through modern day revelations by a prophet?

We call ourselves Christians but do we really know what it means and do we live it? Do we try to be and give our best on a daily basis or do we just do it when it's most convenient, when we can already predict the outcome of our actions and know they will be in our favour?
I know that this is how children act a lot of times towards their parents. When they know for sure that punishment is to be expected since mom/dad will find out in and instant what they have been doing, they get afraid and wish they didn't do what they had done.
Or they don't even do it and tell their friends that they can't since their parents are going to be really mad at them if they do this or that and then some..., they are afraid of the consequences and therefor rather be good instead and listen to what their parents told them.

But sometimes mom and dad aren't there or a punishment for a certain action has not been declared properly and well, what they are about to do is just so much more fun than listening to ones parents! They just don't understand that we love them and really don't want to be a party pooper but keep our children as safe as possible. We want to know that they will know what to do in certain situations without having been into them before. We want them to trust us that they don't need to experience everything there is. Some things are best left unexperienced!
And our heavenly father knows best what will bring us sorrow and pain and has warned us, yet given us free agency. So what do we do with it? Do we trust him and take his word on it - or do we wander through the valley of temptation, sin, drugs, bad choices and take a little here and there just to sample it?

What the heck, explore it all now, live free, repend later, right? Unfortunately that's not how it works. Sure, we can give it a try, see how it all works and what kind of influence it has on us - but the next choice may not be our own! We can take the first step towards something that we have been warned about - but do we know what it will lead us into? Do we really know it all so we are able to predict the results? Do we know what our choices will mean to the loved ones around us and how they may actually have to suffer because of them?

We can't see and know it all and that's why we have been given parents and leaders here on earth who hopefully lead us into the right direction and towards the light. And we have a heavenly father who told us and still tells us what is right and what will lead us down the path of light and truth, towards true joy and everlasting blessings.
If only we were accepting that he truly loves us and wants what's best for us! Like I am not my daughter's enemy, neither is our heavenly father ours! He is not the almighty party pooper - but he sure knows it all and best and sometimes it may be wiser to just listen to him instead of trying it all out for ourselves...
And sometimes I wish my daughter would understand that I really want what's best for her, nothing else!

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